


Who's That Bachelor?

by Pokeevee57



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Bachelor, Cursed, Debt, Did We Mention That This Was Cursed?, Funny, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Meta, Parody, Pop Culture, Silly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-08
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-10-06 22:41:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17353958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pokeevee57/pseuds/Pokeevee57
Summary: In a society where pocket monsters are the only intelligent life form, a financially struggling Pikachu enters into the disaster-in-the-making reality TV show called 'Who's That Bachelor?' in order to win the grand prize of $10,000,000,000.And maybe, along the way, bag a smoking hot Pokemon partner.Gotta catch 'em all, as he says!





	Who's That Bachelor?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, this is Pokeevee57 speaking! Thanks for checking this probably cursed fic out, lol. 
> 
> Both of us authors thank you a bunch! Please enjoy! 
> 
> We don’t own Pokémon in any aspect~

In little Ketchum Town, there was a very sad looking Pikachu who was in front of a table overflowing with bills. Why did he have so many unpaid bills, you may ask? It's because he's in debt for buying a lifetime supply of ketchup. Yep, you heard right. He's in _debt_ for _buying_ a _lifetime supply_ of _ketchup_.

And this young Pokemon, known as Ryan _(Just Ryan not Ryan Reynolds, though you  shouldn't be surprised if he knew a Ryan Reynolds)_ , was now in a conundrum. For you see, what shall he now do without the basic necessities he needs, especially since he's now out of a job?

Ah, the stupidity of a Pikachu addicted to ketchup.  It's almost as bad as the time the entire Pokemon community discovered ginger ale and got drunk off of it. 

But let's not head into that territory . . . 

Instead let us continue on with our young protagonist. 

"Pika pika pika pika pika pika pika pika . . ." Ryan sighed. It was time to go out and face the world. Ryan got up and went out of his shabby looking apartment, passing by a couple _(Squirtle and Butterfree, who knew they had a thing for each other)_ to go to the bar.

Ryan entered the bar and took his usual seat at the counter. The bartender, a Gallade, glared at him harshly before sliding a bottle of ketchup his way. Ryan nodded at the bartender then chugged it down like he was a drunk wasting his life away, which he technically was.

Another pokemon slid into the seat next to him. Ryan took a quick glance before he realized exactly who was beside him. A Mew sat next to him, its purple tail flickering back and forth. This was't any Mew, however. This Mew was his one, and only, Grandmother. 

"Pika!" Ryan chocked on the ketchup, some of it dripping down his chin and onto his fur. "Mew mew." Grandmother flagged down the bartender and ordered Very Berry Alcoholic Surprise. She then smacked the back of his head with her tail. 

"Mew, mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew. Mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew."

Grandmother then took a sip from her drink while Ryan just looked at his ketchup bottle in guilt. He didn't know that his Grandmother was in town. If he had known, he would have tried to look better than a homeless Shia LaBeouf. 

"Mew mew mew mew mew mew?" Grandmother asked. Ryan shook his head in the negative. "Mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew." Ryan winced at that. He didn't want any of his family to know about his horrible situation. But it seemed that Grandmother had found out about it already. 

"Mew mew mew mew mew mew mew, mew. Mew mew mew mew mew mew. Mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew. Mew mew mew mew mew mew. Mew mew mew mew mew mew mew, mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew mew." With that said, Grandmother left the bar. 

The warning Ryan was given was stuck in his head. Since he got himself into this mess, he was going to be the one who got himself out of it. 

Ryan groaned. He already knew that this was helpless. How was he ever going to have time to find $5,000,000 quickly enough to bay off his debt and his rent for the month?

He was about to slam his head into the table before a flashy flyer caught his eye. 

‘Want to catch a date? Need some money? Get both and more when you sign up for _Who’s That Bachelor?_ , a reality TV drama that’ll give you everything you’d ever want! 

The prize for winning? $10,000,000!’ 

Ryan blinked and stared dumbly at the flyer for a moment, not quite processing the information he just took in _(partially because it was unbelievable and partly because of his stupidity)_. And then....

”PIKA?!” Ryan looked at the unassuming flyer in disbelief. He didn’t know if it was because fate was on his side or if it was the only stroke of good luck he’d ever have in his life, but this could be the perfect opportunity.

Oh, all of the ketchup he could-! 

He shook his head. Uh, all of the  _bills and expenses_ he could pay off. 

. . . and all of the other stuff he could use that sweet, sweet cash for.

He gave the flyer a look one last time, and then he grabbed it with his sticky, ketchup-covered palm, not even paying any notice to the bartender who seemed quite annoyed at him as he tore the flyer away. 

This was Ryan’s opportunity. A wonderful opportunity to get some quick cash and maybe even a cute Pokémon. 

Not like there was anything else he could really do.

Besides, what could  _possibly_ go wrong?

**Author's Note:**

> Pokeevee here again! 
> 
> Sorry about all that Pokémon talk! Us authors don’t actually know what these guys are saying. We only observe and name things as we see appropriate. 
> 
> We can’t understand Pokémon, after all. 
> 
> Seriously. We have no idea. You’re just gonna have to use context clues lol XD 
> 
> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Sincerely, your accursed writers~


End file.
